Last week I went interstate for some birthday celebrations. It was my 28th and I didn’t want to make a big deal about making a big deal about it, but it was a big deal…..
I was saying RIP to the 27 club and embracing my new look pushing 30. My friends are either that little bit older than me or that little bit behind me and I really felt like I was paving the way turning 28. This was a big deal.
If you haven’t realised by now, I’m all for learning and the one thing I learnt last week is how HIGH MAINTENANCE I AM.
My close friends know it and never fail to remind me, but it honestly didn’t register to me until I fell sick with the dreaded flu on my trip.
Now, I’m all for being independent. Despite living at home with my parents and having most of my dinners cooked for me, I’d say I’m an independent woman. I have a strong mind. I do me… most of the time.
I pay my own bills, buy my own shit, get myself from A to B. I do my own washing, I’m not one to leave the dishes or my personal space in a mess …
So I’m Independent? …. right?
Anyway, I’m on one of my flights, (window seat) and I start FREAKING out. If you’ve ever flown with the flu before, you’ll know it’s really uncomfortable to say the least. My eardrums felt like they were about to rupture, my brain was going to explode, and I literally could not breathe from my nose and every two minutes I was coughing up a dry lung. Awful! I was ringing the bell for a flight attendant constantly. I needed a blanket, I needed ear plugs, paracetamol, 4 bottles of water, a black tea no sugar, I needed a hot wet towel to dampen my face, (I mean honestly).
I look back now and wonder who the hell I think I am. But at the time my maintenance level was at an all-time high.
To top it off, when I ordered my Uber from the airport, my driver didn’t clock that I had a 23kg suitcase plus extra luggage and stayed seated in his driver’s seat – smfh. I could have cried. He popped the boot and I felt like rating him then and there and telling him to fuck off. But I didn’t, I threw the luggage into the boot and hopped in the back seat. I felt so hard done by, I didn’t say a word the entire trip and tried super hard not to sneeze.
It got me thinking though, is this why I’m still single? Because I’m a demanding little shit? Like, is the Uber driver meant to get out of the car and assist me with my bags? Or is that just something I expect? Is this how I’ve treated those I’ve dated and why they think I’m a selfish twit?
Skip through to my last day before flying home. I was staying with one of my besties and my bad mood was at its peak. I had lost so much sleep throughout the week and I just wanted to have some damn fun! I was ready to spend hundreds on an emergency flight just to get back to my own bed a day earlier #dramatic. I sat in her bed miserable, crying, feeling sorry for myself and complaining about my nails and my red Rudolph nose. I watched as she got out the essential oils and turned on the diffuser, warmed me up a heat pack, handed me a herbal tea and an assortment of drugs, closed the blinds and booked me a manicure appointment!!!!!
Uhmm who needs a partner when you have a bestie who treats you like a princess?
In light of what a damn good friend I have, I decided to really suck it up and go out for the last night of my trip. The last week of travels had been so tiring I can’t even bring myself to write about it but I thought, ‘tonight I’ll go out with my flu, hand in hand’.
I must say, I’m thankful for my Fenty beauty cause’ it’s the only reason my makeup stayed on through 79 sessions of me sneezing and blowing my nose in-between dances.
I was an entitled little brat all night. I made the bar tender make me a cocktail he had never heard of and didn’t serve at the club. I held up the girl’s bathroom line like I was Beyoncé, and I asked the DJ to play me a birthday song on a ‘no requests no regrets’ night. I gave no fucks. I told management they need to get with the times and ditch the plastic straws and I asked for the outside heaters on deck to be moved to the corner I was sitting in because – ‘flu season’.
All in all it was a great night, but I suffered for it the next day on my flight home. Thank fuck I was flying with Qantas on my way home because their service was on point. I was handed a packet of tissues and 3 little bottles of water, (I didn’t even need to ring the bell.) #economybitches
So maybe I’m not so ‘independent’, I came home to a warm arse bed and my Dads home cooked soup. My vaporiser was already steaming, and I could feel that my sheets had been freshly washed.
I know now that when I’m not feeling good, I basically expect everyone to fall at my knees and give in to my demands, including the bar tender and club management on a night out. But is that so bad?
Here’s a quote from Rachel Hollis that I probably should have read before my birthday trip.
“The difficult seasons we walk through are how we learn to build up strength to manage any situation”
There’s nothing like realising that what everyone’s always told you about yourself is true. I know I’m demanding, I know I’m high maintenance and possibly not as independent as id like to be. I like to have things done my way and when things start to go wrong I.flip.the.fuck.out.
I guess the hard shit we go through, whether it be *really hard* or falling sick with the flu on holiday, sets us up for growth. We get through it, we grow stronger and we are better equipped for the next thing life throws at us.
PS. Thanks to my babe for putting up with my shit. God bless you.